Chaturday | a day in the life

I love reading those posts and watching those videos of a day in the life of vloggers and bloggers who have these perfectly productive days and seem to have all their shit together. I wish I had that motivation and determination to get up at 6am for the gym or, spend time baking cake, doing yoga or make my food shop into a whimsical fulfilling experience. I tend to just blag my way through life and by some miracle just about get by unscathed. Here’s a typical day in the life of me:

After pressing the snooze button and ignoring Luke’s constant updates of the time I finally jump out of bed. Realising that there’s no time to shower I stagger to bathroom to brush my teeth, slathering some moisturiser on my face along the way. I sit, shivering in front of the mirror trying to open my eyes wide enough to ensure that I’m putting make-up on in the right places whilst watching time move twice as quickly as usual (bearing in mind I start work at 9am and have a 15-20minute walk ahead). If I’m lucky, I’ll drag some straighteners through my hair – not that it makes much effort to the dishevelled mess that lives on top of my head. I’ll grab whatever suitable work attire is clean and hanging on the dryer and attempt to stumble into a pair of tights without laddering them. Without concentrating, I’ll force my feet into my heels, trip and fall, swear a lot and then begin cramming my bag with all the crap I need for the day. I’ll put my coat on, undertake one last spot check in the mirror and walk out of the flat, down the stairs and half way down our road.
I’ve left my straighteners on, I’ll run back upstairs, burst open the door, trip over the piles of bank statements I’m too afraid to open and frantically unplug everything…ever.

Text my boss and advise her that I’ll be a few minutes late wasting the hard earned flex time that could be used to take a Friday afternoon off to sort through my washing, or, bills, or, life.

Walk into work whilst apologising to everyone for being late whilst wishing I had gotten up early enough for breakfast or coffee. COFFEE, run upstairs (trip) make coffee and proceed to turn on my PC whilst slapping myself in the face to try and wake myself up enough to focus on the torrent of emails clogging up my inbox.

Working in the town centre can only mean one thing: retail therapy. I wander aimlessly around shops for half an hour picking up and putting down an plethora of clothes shoes and make-up…see I do have some self control.

Aggressively turn off my PC and leave the building promising I will go to the gym as soon as I get in and then sort the washing out.

I get in from work and head to the fridge whilst taking my tights off, once there I chop three lumps of cheese up and eat them, then scoff and hand full of peanuts. Oh, that coleslaw looks good a spoonful won’t hurt, have we got any mini cheddars left?

Sit on the bed and start watching Snapchat stories, scrolling through Instagram and Twitter and staring into the darkness that is my future.

My stomach rumbles and wakes me from the staring into the darkness thing. I go into the living room to argue with Luke about who’s turn it is to cook dinner – its his. I return to the bedroom to continue my social media scrolling, I might catch up on the soaps and do some blog related stuff, this part of my evening is almost productive.

Eat dinner in front of the TV in PJ’s usually watching something Gordon Ramsey related. 

Go back to the bedroom and think about how I will get up earlier tomorrow and sort my life out. Start clearing up the massacre I made of my dressing table in the morning and mentally planning the next day’s outfit based on what I remember was left on the clothes rail (I really need to sort the washing out). Decide I’m going to have a bath at 9pm so that I have time to wash and dry my hair and get an early night.

Get caught up in a huge conversation in a group chat or, talk to my cousin for too long on the phone or, start writing another post or, just stare into the darkness that is my life again.

Run a bath and finally get in it – frantically wash my hair whilst watching the clock.Scrap the idea of a relaxing facemask there's no time. I climb out of the bath (usually slip) and then lie on the bed for “a few minutes” to dry.

It’s too late to dry my hair and I want an early night, I screw it up on top of my head. Announce that I am going to bed to Luke like I’m some kind of mature 26 year old with her life in order. Climb into bed, set alarms for 6:30am and try and force myself to sleep.

How the hell am I watching cat videos on Youtube? Why am I such a Dick?






  1. Pahahahahaha girrrrllll... our lives are way, way too similar. I'm literally late everyday, my hair is some mad untameable bird's nest, I ALWAYS lie down after a bath and then fall into a YouTube / Instagram hole for hours and cheese. No more needs to be said. Loved this post

    N xx | Lovelaughslipstick x

  2. Hahaha! I feel like you just narrated my day. Even the Gordon Ramsey bit! This post hit me on an emotional level. Every day I promise to be better at life. Well done for getting by though :) xx

    Tina x