Autumn Style

After losing my mind a bit (catch up here) I'm happy to announce that I am pretty much back to normal. I've not been horrible to Luke for a while, my hair is the shade of blonde I wanted, I'm back in my pre-preggo jeans and I'm starting to actually have a life. I've even booked my return to work date, enrolled Freddie into nursery LEFT THE BABY WITH PEOPLE, got a bit drunk and have even been a bit Hinched.

The main factor in this new-found happiness is that my body finally feels like it's mine again; and I'm not just talking about losing baby weight. I'm lucky enough to have very quickly got back into my old clothes and, although this does make me hugely happy because a) I don't have to buy new clothes and b) I can now buy more clothes. I feel like I finally recognise myself. Pregnancy means giving up your whole body to someone else, it's taken off you for a good year, longer if you're breastfeeding or struggling to lose weight or have complications and it's a tough time. It doesn't help that on one side women are being told that they need to lose weight quickly and on another we're being told that we don't have to stress it and should embrace our 'Mummy Bodies'; working out where you stand on the matter and what you want with your body can be complicated and working out what the right thing to do or say is just an additional unnecessary stress.

Let's talk about my body, as much as I now recognise myself there's still the signs that Freddie once took up residence there. My old cute and tiny bellybutton now resembles a wrinkly arsehole, my piercing is so stretched that it looks gross without a belly bar in and I have this little bit of stretched skin that pops over my leggings if I don't pull them up high enough. My hairline is getting better but I did have two almost bald patches on the side of my head for a while, my faj is scarred and my boobs have just given up - my nipples are massive with dark patches and point down, the skin is stretched and bumpy and they resemble ping-pong balls in socks. I'm not keen on these changes, I don't embrace them or even celebrate them but I do accept them, I'm content in my body and that's more than some women in my position. I think society needs to find a good balance when it comes to our post-partum bodies, as much as we should be confident in them it needs to be acknowledged that it is ok to really not like them too and we shouldn't be shamed for wanting to change them and be our old selves. 

After living in leggings and baggy jumpers for so long, I'm enjoying finding my style again. Whilst baggy jumpers and leggings will always be a go-to in my wardrobe, I'm relishing wearing jeans, tights and skirts and not having swollen feet that won't fit into heels. My Mum bought me a Barbour coat when Freddie was three days old as a treat and I cannot get enough of it. Primark have a strong mini-skirt game this season and I am all for it and as for these Newlook boots, need I say more?

Skirt: Primark (along with tights and jumper)
Boots: Newlook (I can't find them online but they were £35.99, don't tell Luke)

1 comment

  1. I don't know what I love more - you or that skirt. SO CUTE! SO glad you are feeling more yourself, its so hard to find yourself after having a baby consuming your life for so long, so its good to see you have found a balance which is working for you :)

    Erin || MakeErinOver